Nick was born on 4th March 1986, he had lots of dark hair and big blue eyes, the nurses all wanted to hold him and fuss over him. I took him home nine days later to introduce him to his big brother, Michael, and older siblings. They were very protective of their little brother, Michael would carry him to me saying: “he is crying.” He wasn’t, I think Michael just wanted a cuddle really. Nick’s older siblings remember fondly their baby brother’s mop of hair, big blue eyes, and inquisitive and adventurous nature.
Being the second boy in a family of girls Nick was loved by us all and would be spoiled by his aunties, and hang out with his cousins. Nick started school at four and half, when I collected him at the end of the day and asked if he had, had a good day, he stood and told me: “they keep calling me Nicolas!” This was because we had always called him ‘Nicky’ as a toddler – that was until he got older and preferred to be called Nick. He enjoyed school and was extremely popular especially with the girls – he had a smile that would brighten up the room and the most infectious laugh.
Nick was 14-months-old when his little sister, Amy, came along. Nick and Amy were inseparable and as time went on Nick was the big brother, always looking after his little sister. Nick went on to join the army and while on leave he met his children’s mum, and at just 19, he became a dad to a little boy and two years later they had a daughter. Nick adored his children and would take them on crazy trips out, I think, truth-be-told, Nick liked it as much as they did.
Michael and Amy would tease Nick for being a ‘mummy’s boy’ – we did spend a lot of time together; talking, laughing, crying, singing and dancing. Nick was always there when I needed help especially with my DIY disasters, he would hug me when I got upset and say: “Don’t cry mum it will be ok, I will fix it.” He was a devoted son, a supportive and sometimes annoying brother, a fun-loving, entertaining uncle and father-of-two. Amy was always Nick’s go-to person, they enjoyed walking their dogs, giving them some private time to chat about all sorts. Amy’s children loved it when ‘Uncle Nick’ came to visit, because he would spend time with the boys on computer games, and let his niece put bows and bobbles in his post-Covid-19 curly hair, he also spent hours teaching her to ride a bike. Nick was the only person Amy would allow to shorten her daughter’s name from Violet to Vi.
Nick was very sociable and was always first on the dance floor. He was the life and soul of the party and was even trying to teach me a few moves (but without much success). Nick was a free spirit, he never let anyone, or anything get him down, (which is why I chose the song ‘This is Me’ from the Greatest Showman at his funeral). These are all memories that will be cherished forever in our hearts and thoughts as our large jigsaw-puzzle family, now has a piece missing, and will never again be complete. Nick will not see his children grow up, meet his grandchildren or be there for any future milestones.
On the 18th August 2021, two police officers knocked on my door to tell me that while on his way to work, Nick had come off his motorbike, he was alive, but before he could move, a speeding driver hit him. Passers-by and other motorists stopped to help Nick following the collision and did what they could to comfort him while emergency services made their way to the scene. Sadly, despite their best efforts, Nick died at the scene. The minute the police told me Nick had been killed I felt like I was on the outside looking in and all I could think was I needed to get to my daughter.
The officers drove me to Amy’s house where we broke the news to her and Nick’s children, while we were there our Family Liaison Officer, Scott, arrived and talked us through what was going to happen next. Scott stayed with us while we called the rest of the family and waited for Michael to drive from his home to be with us.
We arranged Nick’s funeral together, everyone having some input. Michael chose some songs, Amy sourced a motorcycle hearse and notified the biking community who escorted the procession to the crematorium. We all agreed Nick would be saying: “Check me out the leader of the pack.”
After, we had a meeting at Bromsgrove Police Station when Scott referred us to RoadPeace, I sent them an email and we were invited to attend RoadPeace’s Service of Remembrance at the National Memorial Arboretum – there I got talking to other families in the very same position as myself. Amy found comfort in our local popup bereavement café run by the church where Nick is buried, while I have found RoadPeace and the families I have come to love and respect, so supportive, no matter what or how I’m feeling.
The CPS decided not to prosecute the driver for Nick’s death, RoadPeace then supported me through 3 years and 2 months of battles via the ‘Victim’s Right to Review’ process, eventually resulting in this decision being changed. When the letter came to say the CPS were going to charge the driver with Causing death by careless driving, I called my children, and then Lucy, who were all relieved that we were going to get some justice for my son’s death.
Going through the trial that followed was not only distressing, but exhausting. Kate from RoadPeace was there for us all every day, I can’t thank her enough for that support – while I was trying to be strong for my children, she was strong for me. The jury returned a guilty verdict on Monday 2nd December 2024, and the driver was sentenced to 20 months in prison, of which she would serve 40% in custody, she was also disqualified from driving to two years and ten months. Nowhere near enough for the loss of my son’s life.
Road deaths are unnecessary. RoadPeace aim to reduce road danger and raise awareness of the devastation that road death has on families, innocent people and witnesses.
From the day I emailed RoadPeace, to today, I have felt supported, encouraged, and loved, I have attended several meetings and events. I feel that having this space where we can all be ourselves, without judgement, and are able to cry, or laugh together, is vital.
With a more natural death, we grieve and hurt, but can more readily accept that a life has been lived and drawn to its inevitable close. But with a road death, the grief is not only the life that was, but also the life that might have been.
None of us would have ever expected to be here today, or to be a part of this group, and I should not be stood before you trying to find the words to bring some comfort or consolation when there really are none. There is no hiding from where we find ourselves today, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be brave and resilient, for our loved ones.
I am proud of the fight I had to take on and even prouder to be a part of such an amazing group of kind, caring, strong people, that I will always treasure for ever. A RoadPeace family that have even been recognised by royalty with the King’s Award for Voluntary Service.
Nick’s light was sadly snubbed out but will always shine bright in my heart, and in those of his siblings, children and elderly grandmother. He will be in our family’s memories forever.
-Denice Bennell
